Patience Is A Big Wait

Hey Lovers,

God's been laying MOUNDS of interesting little things on my heart lately. So much so that it's given me reason substantial enough to open this note. It has been quite SOME time since I've put these fingers to the test. Fear of writer's block had me by the throat again for an overly extended amount of time. Of course...I didn't reeeally have writer's block. I just used that as my excuse to be lazy.

It's ironic, the things that I wrote 2 notes ago...in "Much to Learn". It was basically me preaching to myself, but more noticibly to the world, about utilizing the personal talents God has entrusted us with. I even used scripture with The Parable of the Talents...how rediculous am I? Really. Only then did I carry on to say "she's baa-aak" in the closing. Lies. Here I am 8 months later, I've written 2 notes. And one of them is a Q U O T E. The whole thing...is a quote...by someone else, NOT me. Sometimes I wonder why God puts up with my shannanogans.

How often do we do this thing where He teaches us something, be it through consequence, strife, or just stark realization...and then we forget like 5 minutes later and slither back to what we doing/not doing before?

Last time I was out in SoCal visiting the bf, I went to his church with him. During the sermon his pastor mentioned that he was doing this 9 month thing (no, neither he or his wife were preggers:). Fruits of the Spirit. One fruit at a time...to focus on, to learn about, to completely absorb and leak out. It was then that I decided it would be a good idea if I hopped aboard this fruit train as well. Ok...that just sounded bad. HAHA! :) You know what I mean...

ANYway:) I wrote out all the Fruits of the Spirit: Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control all onto little pieces of paper, tossed em into a hat, and went digging for March. Only to realize that I reached for the fruit of the DOOM. Unfortunately, I had a witness around when I made my selection....and he...was verrry adamant about sticking with the current pick. Grrrr...

Today is March 13...so I've got 13 days of PATIENCE under my belt. How am I doing with it? Well...I'm learning. Patience, for me, is that one blasted fruit that I just wish I could blot out of the Bible with one giganto white-out pen. But nobody said that honoring God was an easy thing to do, right? If I love Him though, my efforts will be endless. I'm realizing that patience gives people permission to be human. No one is perfect. We all have flaws, we all make mistakes. And sometimes, even after we've learned...we come back to those saaaame mistakes over and over AND over again. It's exhausting to even think about. That's where, if I was God, I'd be like, "Alright, CLEARly you're not getting it, see ya". Good thing I'm not God. I mean, can you even FATHOM the kind of patience He must have to permeate everyday? The kind of love it takes to even want to do that...

I want that. I want to be like that!! I want to have the kind of love where patience with other people is something that I don't just feel is right, but that I actually want to have...especially since I know what it feels like to be the one on the other end of things.

Well my brain is starting to explode from so much writing after being away for a while.
I'll part from you with a quote and be on my "patient way" :)

" Patience is bitter, but it's fruit is sweet " - Lida Clarkson

<3 Abbergail

Much to Learn.

Monica Wood...author of Pocket Muse speaks to me something simple yet...so perfect, so...tangible. It's the facts of life in the writing world and it's EXACTLY what I needed to get me back on my feet again. And this is what she says...

"My friend Allison Hagy, whose writing makes me swoon, gave me the best advice I ever got:

'You have to be willing to write badly....' "

I'm about to go off of this for a while, but I promise...I'll come back to it in thee end and everything should tie together into a nice, neat bow. Crossing my fingers...

It is my understanding that God has graced us with a multitude of gifts...gifts that make us who we are, in Him, gifts that-through Him-serve a unique purpose, infused with great opportunity...gifts that make us different from the next. And some of these gifts come with more or less natural ability, but ultimately, you decide what becomes of it. Are you gonna take it as is and just play around with it every so often when you get bored? Or are you gonna embrace it head on, and run with it, no looking back?

Let's go to the SWORD...shall we?

In Matthew 25 Jesus tells us a parable about a man who decides to entrust his land (Which, back then, was everything) to 3 of his slaves as he sets out on a journey:
"To one he gave five talents, to another two, and to another one, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The one who had received five talents went off right away and put his money to work and gained five more. In the same way, the one who had two gained two more. But the one who had received one talent went out and dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money in it. After a long time, the master of those slaves came and settled his accounts with them. The one who had received the five talents came and brought five more, saying, ‘Sir, you entrusted me with five talents. See, I have gained five more. His master answered, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful in a few things. I will put you in charge of many things. Enter into the joy of your master.’ The one with the two talents also came and said, ‘Sir, you entrusted two talents to me. See, I have gained two more.’ His master answered, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things. I will put you in charge of many things. Enter into the joy of your master.’ Then the one who had received the one talent came and said, ‘Sir, I knew that you were a hard man, harvesting where you did not sow, and gathering where you did not scatter seed, so I was afraid, and I went and hid your talent in the ground. See, you have what is yours.’ But his master answered, ‘Evil and lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I didn’t sow and gather where I didn’t scatter? Then you should have deposited my money with the bankers, and on my return I would have received my money back with interest! Therefore take the talent from him and give it to the one who has ten. For the one who has will be given more, and he will have more than enough. But the one who does not have, even what he has will be taken from him. And throw that worthless slave into the outer darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth’"

-Matthew 25:15-30

Weeping and gnashing of teeth? Well that sounds like fun, ay?

Hey there's gonna be a killer party this weekend. Let's get the gang together and go.Yea, yea!...weeping and gnashing of teeth....it's gonna be sick, bro! Are you in?

Hmmm, sounds real good. I'll take a rain check on that one. Maybe a few...

The gifts that are given to us are not something we're supposed to hoard or conserve. And a lot of times, there is a workload to carry in order to get where we may want or need to be. I believe that one of the many gifts God has blessed me with is writing. He gave me my own voice and a way to speak it to others...maybe not in the way that you or anyone else would, but the way that me, being me would :) And that's where that uniqueness comes in. I love it....but....have I embraced it? Or have I neglected it? ...even for a short time...

I have learned that in order to succeed, sometimes you need to fail first...it is an on-going lesson in life. You forget it, but it is sure to come back and teach you some more.

Well Ms. Allison Hagy....thankyou. For such a small phrase of yours has opened so many doors of thought for me. I realized that becoming a good writer means being a bad one sometimes...and I need to be okay with that...and be willing to work through it, instead of neglecting my gift all together just because I fear failure. I want to give my all and never nothing. And I want to lift my weary head, and let my eyes fall into the eyes of the One that says to me..."Well done, my good and faithful servant..." :)

She's baaaa-aaaaack :)

A Blog With No Name.

Meet Ralph.

The Orange Tabby orphan kitten I have taken care of for the past two days.

It's sort of a lengthly story, for writing-the reason behind how I ended up with him, but in a nutshell, he was found by someone who didn't want him, who gave him to someone else...who also did not want him, who gave him to me so that I may find someone who, indeed, did want this little rambuncious ball of fur. AND with the little tid-bit of info, given to anyone that was suggested as a potential owner, that he had a respiratory infection and most likely needed to be treated, it was only a matter of time...the animal shelter became Ralph's only hope. I would have kept him as my own...but logical thinking made me aware of the slightly overlooked fact that I am NOT at all a cat person. And much like any other small, cute, and fuzzy creature-sad to say, our friend Ralph would one day grow from a sweet, playful, and lovable kitten... into a large, fat, good-for-nothing-but-lounging, lazy cat right before my very eyes. This small sense of reality spark gave me the push I needed to say no, and after that it was-a-skipping to Lakeland Animal Shelter we went. They promised they would treat his needs and find a suitable home for him...*sigh* I am at ease :)....

With that being said...I would also like to say this:

Dear Ralph,

The first time I saw you and looked up at me, from the bottom of your big brown box, with your massive, crusty, blue eyes...I melted, and then I fetched you some water cause you looked parched...and boy, you SURE were. You lapped that water up within seconds. It was truly amazing. You were always talented like that. Then you would sneeze your cute, little sneeze and I would wipe the nasties from your face as you meowed relentlessly until I drew the cloth away.

I'll never forget how you woke me up 3 different times in the night, to clean out your box, because I could not stand the smell of your pooh...even as I was sleeping (gross!). Oh, haha! *throwing my head back in laughter* and how you cunningly drew Rachel in with your sweet facade, and just when she ALMOST liked you...that's when you drew out the daggers and became her worse nightmare all over again. That was good. You were good. And I will miss you aaaand all of your goodness. I pray that you would find yourself in the arms of an owner that can handle so much intensity from such a seemingly small, feline friend. And you were my friend. You are my friend. And forever will be. Goodbye, Ralph. It was fun while it lasted.

Love, Abi :)

Anybody remember my temporary obsession with Stukenberg last fall?

Well I fear, for all of you, that it's being brought back from the dead.

They recorded their last album in a Silo...just for kicks. That's a really sweet kick if you ask me...creative, remarkable, astonishing...they call it...The Silo Project *cue the oooo's and ahhhh's* Yea...I'm not sure if it came out yet, but curiousity led me to their blog site thee other day and now I am determined to find out if the new tunes have been released yet. And I will find out. You wait. You see.

Next in line of events...I am trying desperately to discover what to dub as my "life verse" for next Sunday's graduation ceremony at church. I have come across numerous amounts of favored verses, verses that have helped me through down times, verses to help me embrace all of Him, even in my times of great joy:), verses that have helped me to hear and see God for who He truly is, to remind me of His amazing love, verses that make me feel new again, that make me feel like I can do anything...with Him:) but...I just can't seem to reach a final decision. Any suggestions may be of help. A lot of the good things in life come unexpectedly. I'm thinking it could be the same case in this sci-nario. I don't have much time at all to figure it out. I hope the lightbulb switch gets tugged at soon.

Well...I am tuuuuh-ckered OUT...at least on the writing side of things...just for now. I'll be back soon. And sooner then the time it took me from the last blog til now. I promise. But I'm outie. Sorry to peace so abruptly. I'll make it up to you on the flipside.

Goodnight to all :)

The Bee Jive?

Yes. Why? There are many a reasons, Dear Reader...

The first I would like to lay before you is this:

Bee-[Bee]

-noun
3. A community social gathering in order to perform some task, engage in a contest, etc.: a sewing bee; a spelling bee; a husking bee.

This is a social gathering. Maybe not like the kind you would expect, but nonetheless, blogs are a place for people to share their thoughts and ideas on a more public eye level. Which makes it somewhat of a social rendezvous, if you think about it. The task at hand is writing, reading, and reflecting...under most of circumstances. And we all either get it done or we don't. That goes for the writer as well as the reader. If there's no writer, there's no reader. And if there's no reader...why write? (And by the way, the writer does count as a reader, but that's never much too exciting for the writer unless that's his soul purpose for doing so;) It's a team effort really though. So I don't just want you here, I need you here.

I'm not, by any means, saying that my writing is even worthy of being read by more than a handful of people...who most likely read for supportive reasons more than anything else anyway. Come take a gander once in a while though. I just might suprise you, enlighten you, make you bait and brain tackle something you might have never thought about before, maybe make you feel like there's still hope when it seems all is lost, or just make you laugh if that's all you really needed to put that spunky skip back into your step. I love to do that. It is so encouraging when people read my stuff too. It makes me feel like I might actually have something promising ahead of me. You know? Anyone is welcome to this hive :)

Reasons continue...

Recently, my boyfriend, in his nimble tendencies, came up with the nickname "Bee" for me. Well at first it was Bumblebee, but not long after, was shortend. Abi...Ah-Bee. Cute, huh? I thought so too. This becomes an additional reason behind the choice to throw Bee in there with the Jive.

And continue...

Jive-[jahyv]

-noun
1. Swing music or early jazz.

-verb
5. To dance to jive; jitterbug.
6. Slang. to engage in kidding, teasing, or exaggeration.

Jive. It's something and it's something you do. I've always wanted to learn dance...all different kinds. If I had a shot at learning, my first choice would be Swing. Ever seen Swing Kids? I'm putting the blame on that movie for contributing to my fantasies of learning and hopefully, one day, mastering the art of dance. And also the fact that I used to watch my brothers and cousins practice it in the living room when I was younger. But back then, much to my dismay, I was "too little" to be involved with that whole schpeil. Still...it all originates back to swing and jazz. And that concludes the noun side of things.

As for the verb portion...there is not only dance, but to dance. And that is what I do, despite my lack of talent in such areas of my life... May I also turn your attention to definition number 6? I have a very teasing and jokey persona at times. Exaggeration also slides, just perfectly, right into my sense of humor. So it all comes together so nicely, doesn't it?

Also...I would like to point out to you, if you have not noticed, the cleverness and crafti-like vibe the name of my blog, as a whole, gives off....The Bee Jive....jive...hive...they rhyme, but it's not a hive...it's a bee...doing the jive. Ya get? :)

That title was "the bee's knees" to me when I first heard it roll off the tip of my tounge. It came as sort of shocker that something so great, at least to me, came to me so unexpectedly as I was scrubbing the dishes with all of my little might. I wasn't even thinking about it. And I had been trying desperately to come up with a title, for weeks, that gave me at least a smidgen of satisfaction...that also, very loudly, shouted "ME!"...and ALAS!

One more thing. I already know that some of you will ask. So I'll just get it out of the way.

My link: http://fortheloveofjacknorman.blogspot.com/

For the Love of Jack Norman...

My very first journal that expressed many different ways of my creativeness, aside the writing aspect, I dubbed the named...Jack Norman. Yes, I name my journals. It is a quirk you can make fun of me about til your blue in the face, and it still would not phase me one bit. So I attribute this blogspot to the writings in Jack Norman. Call me redonkulous, if you choose. I love the personalness of it...if personalness is even a word:)

Alright well I'm tired as a rock. Thankyou for listening...or reading...rather. Good night. and the sweetest of dreams to you all.
-Love-ah-thee-Abbergails <3